Watching my grandchildren is mostly a joyful experience. But every day, the thought comes at least once. What if we lived there? What if we lived where persecution because of religion or ethnicity is brutally exercised? What if I lost my husband and sons to execution, my daughters and granddaughter to slavery?
I sometimes look at Emmy and think of the reports of even tiny little girls being subjected to horrific abuse. I look at my grandsons and think of the stories of little boys, pressed into service as killers, forced to watch and participate in horrible acts of violence.
I think of the adults and children who have escaped, and wonder what their life was like before the world went crazy. How much like our lives were theirs? Were there small warning signs, or even big ones? Did they ignore them, thinking it can't happen here? Or, was it like a bolt out of the blue and did death begin to walk among them before they had a chance to defend themselves?
I think then of how sad it is that while we are distracted by silly non controversies started by the new form of gossip we call social media, people half a world away are pleading for help. There is little love for truth or mercy in the virtual world, little room for common sense or clarity. It has changed the way we process information to the point where it seems sometimes that critical thinking is dead.
The virtual world is corrupting us, making us harder, more judgmental, and oddly enabling us to ignore atrocities as we get caught up in the minutia of other people's opinions.
I do wonder what they think of us, but I fear what we have become.
Thursday, November 12, 2015
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Project time
Currently I am unemployed. I lost my job about 3 months ago, victim of a layoff by a company looking to outsource field services to save money. The layoff came at a bad time financially, of course. They always do, since there is no such thing as a good time to lose your job from a financial perspective. But, I did receive a severance package so we have been ok up to now.
The layoff came at a good time from the perspective of family needs. I have been able to provide help and support to other members of the family during difficult times and that has been a blessing. Lately, I have been trying to work in some time for myself to rediscover my love for all things art.
Younger me wanted to be an artist. In school it was the only class in which I was happy. It was an easy A, and I even won an honorable mention in a national contest once. Younger me was not impressed with that accomplishment however. Instead, she thought it meant her work wasn't good enough.
Later, younger me had a portfolio reviewed by vcu and was accepted as an art student there. That ended after 3 courses because a teacher told me he did not think I would ever be a commercial artist. Instead he suggested I check into becoming an artist/physical therapist, because there was so much feeling in my drawings of people in need. Young me only heard criticism and gave up. Sad, because to older me it sounds like an awesome compliment, and like a job that would have been a perfect fit.
Off and on thru the years, I have dipped in and out of art, sometimes going years between creative bursts. I rarely drew or painted, although that had been my passion, because of the perceived criticism from the aforementioned teacher.
My most recent step back into creativitiy was with something simple. A makeover of a dresser and mirror. I used someone else's idea from Pinterest, but of course made some of my own modifications and was happy with the results. The second project is still in progress and is a bit more adventuresome. It is my own concept, and I have discussed and bounced ideas off of my husband. I drew out a design, looked up different ways of accomplishing what I wanted to do, and almost chickened out a million times. It is because of Dean's encouragement that I have stuck with it. I was nervous I would not be able to get it right. However, I also knew if I went in a less personally creative direction, I would not be happy. Dean's answer was that if I messed up, I should just do it again until I got it the way I wanted. He has helped me brainstorm and implement throughout the creative process. It has been weeks since I have worked on it, but I should have time this weekend to get back to it. I hope it turns out well. If it doesn't, I promise myself to try again.
The layoff came at a good time from the perspective of family needs. I have been able to provide help and support to other members of the family during difficult times and that has been a blessing. Lately, I have been trying to work in some time for myself to rediscover my love for all things art.
Younger me wanted to be an artist. In school it was the only class in which I was happy. It was an easy A, and I even won an honorable mention in a national contest once. Younger me was not impressed with that accomplishment however. Instead, she thought it meant her work wasn't good enough.
Later, younger me had a portfolio reviewed by vcu and was accepted as an art student there. That ended after 3 courses because a teacher told me he did not think I would ever be a commercial artist. Instead he suggested I check into becoming an artist/physical therapist, because there was so much feeling in my drawings of people in need. Young me only heard criticism and gave up. Sad, because to older me it sounds like an awesome compliment, and like a job that would have been a perfect fit.
Off and on thru the years, I have dipped in and out of art, sometimes going years between creative bursts. I rarely drew or painted, although that had been my passion, because of the perceived criticism from the aforementioned teacher.
My most recent step back into creativitiy was with something simple. A makeover of a dresser and mirror. I used someone else's idea from Pinterest, but of course made some of my own modifications and was happy with the results. The second project is still in progress and is a bit more adventuresome. It is my own concept, and I have discussed and bounced ideas off of my husband. I drew out a design, looked up different ways of accomplishing what I wanted to do, and almost chickened out a million times. It is because of Dean's encouragement that I have stuck with it. I was nervous I would not be able to get it right. However, I also knew if I went in a less personally creative direction, I would not be happy. Dean's answer was that if I messed up, I should just do it again until I got it the way I wanted. He has helped me brainstorm and implement throughout the creative process. It has been weeks since I have worked on it, but I should have time this weekend to get back to it. I hope it turns out well. If it doesn't, I promise myself to try again.
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